be healthy

The Girl Next Door tells all

Whenever I hear a friend complain that a man lost it long before her clitoris registered so much as a tingle, I think it must be payback for all those nights back in high school. Back then, a boy would practically wear a hole through the crotch of his Levi's dry-humping our hips--and still we wouldn't lay a finger on his goods. We'd just send the poor soul off into the night with an aching penis. Do we mind now that the tables are turned? Did you mind walking away from a date with balls that felt ready to explode?

Of course we mind. It's frustrating. It's uncomfortable. It's disappointing. And, contrary to popular belief, women are not into sex just for the freakin' intimacy. But, as you did then, we tolerate orgasmless sex because, well, there's always a next time. We just take a deep breath and put it out of our minds--which, as it happens, adult women are much more capable of than teenage boys. As long you don't come too soon too much of the time, it's not such a big deal. We might complain about it to our friends once in a while, but we won't hold a grudge or start daydreaming about screwing Sting for days on end. Wait--we will daydream about screwing Sting--but it won't have anything to do with your sexual longevity.

What I don't understand is why, after enjoying the last waves of his orgasm, every man doesn't then offer a woman his still-firm fingers to finish the job. It would be proper etiquette in that situation, no? Maybe your partner will gently push your hand away and say she just wants to cuddle, but it's more likely that she'll writhe against your fingers in ecstasy. And she won't be the only one who benefits. Putting in that extra effort for the sake of fully satisfying your woman is the kind of thing that inspires future oral sex for you. You scratch our itch, we'll scratch yours.